Three years

Three years ago today was just an average day. Just a no-big-deal kind of day. It was a lunch-with-your-hubby-for-no-special-reason kinda day. So, who am I to argue? I went to Nemschoff and sat in the parking lot waiting for him to come out. He hopped in the car, and we had lunch together. He had about 5 minutes left of his lunch break when his phone rang. Caller ID so politely let him know that it was someone from the Cancer Center calling. Our hearts did a flip-flop, and he quickly answered.

On the other end of the phone call, it was Courtney. She doesn't work there anymore, but she was his first case worker. She was awesome! She said that she had gotten the results from his bone marrow biopsy and that she wanted to make sure we got called. She went over a whole bunch of numbers and levels. (Honestly, it was a lot of blaa blaa blaa.) Brent hung up the phone and told me what she had said.

She said these words, "There's no evidence of Leukemia in your blood."

Cool. Once before we were told that his results were clear. I took that to mean that he was in remission. In fact, I even celebrated the one year anniversary of those results. I even planned a surprise party. And then we found out that's not really considered remission.

So, when Brent told me what Courtney had said, I needed to do some investigating of my own.

Brent and I each went back to work. The first thing on my agenda... call Courtney back. And I did. I just explained that I didn't really understand the info that she had just told Brent. She went over it all again. Awesome. Finally, after all of that I asked her, "Courtney, does this mean what I think it means? Is Brent in remission?"

Pause...

"Yes, Kelli... he's in remission."

I thought and thought... can I keep this info all bottled up until I get home? Brent had a chiropractor appt after work, so he would have to go to Rock Valley. He'd be home late. Surely I was going to have a heart attack (or pee in my pants) if I didn't call him right away. So... I waited as long as I could (no, it wasn't only 5 minutes)... and then I called him. By the time I called, he had left work, went to his chiropractor appt, and had decided to make a quick stop at a 2nd hand store to pick up some jeans for Karter. We were on the phone, me at my desk, and he in the middle of a store, when I got to tell him that he was officially in remission.

Praise Jesus!

We both cried.

Then we laughed, or maybe we were speechless... I don't know. But I remember the feeling so well. Honestly, I still feel it every time he has an appt and hears the words "all clear". Every time is just as exciting as that phone call that we got 3 years ago.

That day went from a no-big-deal kinda day to a really-big-deal kinda day.

Omaha Trip–Part 2

After supper at Swine Dining, we headed back to the hotel for some more supper. Seriously… how cute is she?

Then, it was bedtime…

We had a great time in Omaha. The weather was PERFECT! It wasn’t too hot to spend a day walking around a zoo with kids, but yet it was warm. The kids loved the zoo, the hotel and the restaurant. And the best part…

We get to go back at the beginning of October. Hooray!

Omaha Zoo - Hooyer Edition

Back towards the beginning of August, we went to Omaha with Brent's family. Our plan was to all meet at the zoo, spend the day there and then stay overnight at a hotel. We headed out early(ish) Saturday morning. We learned the hard way not to fully rely on the GPS. We punched in that we wanted to go to Henry Doorley Zoo. As we were driving, we talked about how it felt like we were completely driving around Omaha. Well, it turns out that we should have trusted our instincts. The GPS took us to some drive through safari place (I have since heard that it's a very cool place, just not the place we needed). It ends up that we were about 30 minutes from the zoo. Grrrrr..... Oh well, we made it there eventually.

After a full day at the zoo, we headed to our hotel. As you can imagine, the kids were SO excited to swim. They all jumped in for a little while before we headed to supper. After everyone was ready to go eat, we headed to a place called Swine Dining. It was a BBQ place just outside of Omaha, and it was awesome. Luckily, it was a beautiful day/evening out (weather-wise), so we all sat outside. Here's proof that everyone thoroughly enjoyed it...

Here's a picture of all the grandkids.

More to come...

The Switch to Private

I couldn't take it any longer. I wanted so badly to be be able to post pictures of Destiny, but the agency's rule is that we may only post pictures where we control who sees them. So, I finally couldn't take it anymore, and I made my blog private. Now people need to be given access to my blog, which means that I am controlling who sees it. YEAH!!! I CAN FINALLY POST PICTURES OF OUR BABY GIRL!

So... Here are my three beautiful kiddos...

Be warned... more cute pictures to follow!

The First Few Days

Thursday night (technically Friday morning) went pretty well. Neither one of us could get enough snuggle time with Destiny, so we were completely fine getting up with her during the night. She woke up about every 2 hours for a quick drink, and then went right back to sleep.

Friday and Saturday were pretty much just spent in the hotel. We may have been a bit exhausted from the day of travel that was way too long! So, we just took the chance to relax with our new baby girl.

At some point on Friday we went to Target to stock up on things we’d need that we didn’t take along. We already had 3 BIG suitcases, a stroller and a car seat on the way to North Carolina. There just wasn’t room for things like soap and shampoo. :) Anyway, back to what I was saying. We went to Target. I LOVE Target. Forever and Ever. Amen. (Kristi, does that song remind you of anything? Still makes me giggle.)

Anyway, that’s not important now.

When we weren’t busy cuddling with our baby or napping (don’t judge me), we were going for car rides. As good as it felt to relax and get caught up on some sleep… we were getting pretty stir crazy in that hotel room. We rode around and figured out where things were in Matthews. We got some groceries, we skyped with our boys. And we may have gone back to Target. Oh, and I’m reading The Shack.

Lord, thank you! Thank you for good rest. Thank you for a husband that fights for the chance to bond with our baby girl, even if it means getting up in the middle of the night to sit with her. Thank you for technology so we can see and talk to our boys and our family back home. Thank you for this beautiful addition to our family and for allowing us to be her parents. Lord, please help us to raise her so that she may know that she is truly a Child of The King.

**Don’t worry. I realize that this isn’t really the kind of info that people want to know. I know that people just want to know how Destiny is doing. I get that. Trust me, that’s definitely more important to me than where we went. I just know that I’m never in a million years going to forget the process of bonding with her. I will, however, forget these little details about what we did while we were here. So, I want to quickly document them while I can. I’ll get to the more important stuff. Soon. I promise.

Thursday, March 7th–Gotcha Day (Part II)

We’re coming, baby girl! Mommy & Daddy are coming.

We raced through the Charlotte airport. I was impressed with how quickly our luggage (yes, all of it) made it to the baggage claim. We got our rental car, and we were off. We made it to Matthews (the town the agency is located in) in about 25 minutes. We made it to the parking lot, and then we had to call Doris and tell her we couldn’t find the right building. As we parked and got out of the car, my stomach was in my throat. We grabbed the car seat and the blanket that I had made, and we headed inside.

Doris and Jim welcomed us, and we sat and made small talk with them a little bit. Jim slipped back into his office to work on whatever project he was working on, and Doris started going over paperwork with us. She went over legal risks and medical history. She covered the fees, and we wrote out the check. As we finished that part of it, Doris got a text from Leah, the foster mom. She was in the parking lot.

I started to get giddy. Our baby girl was right outside that door. I didn’t really know how to act. Do I sit or stand? Brent had already told me that I could hold her first (have I mentioned how much I love him?), so we didn’t have to worry about that. Should I peek out there? Or should I try be patient for one more minute?

Doris and Leah walked in the door. Leah had this great smile and was full of life. Immediately I knew that I would love this woman. She was the one that took care of our daughter when we weren’t able to be there. She kept the car seat turned so we couldn’t see her. She wanted to fix her headband and get her all set. And then… she took her out of the car seat…

We sat for a time and talked with Leah. She told us about your schedule and about your family. She told us that you were calm and laid back. That you had been a true delight to have around. Leah and her husband John (and their two kids) have been doing foster care like this for two years. They let their kids take turns naming the babies that they care for, so they called her Baby Kate. We told her about Karter and Brody, and a little bit about ourselves.

And then… we had the OK to leave the agency WITH OUR BABY GIRL! It was just like when we left the hospital after having Karter and Brody. It was a proud walk to the car. We got the car seat all buckled in the back seat, and we were off.

We made it to the hotel as quickly as we could. It was about 10:30 in North Carolina, which meant that it was 9:30 for Karter and Brody. We had something very important to do. We got checked in, grabbed the baby and my computer and headed up to our room. My mom had taken the boys to Kristi’s house so that we could have a video chat. We had made the rule that no one could see a picture or know her name before the boys. And trust me… we were dying to get the word out.

We got all set up, and we could see the boys. Oh, I think they had grown already. They were so excited, too. So there, around that little screen we told them we had picked up their baby sister…

DESTINY DEONI HOOYER!

And then we showed them the little girl that they, too, had been praying for. And just like that… they were in love. We talked with them for a little bit, but it was past their bed time, so it was pretty short. We said our goodbyes, and we shut the computer.

Unfortunately, our night wasn’t over yet. We still had to find a Walmart. Apparently when you have a baby you need diapers and formula. Oops! It was about 2:00 before we had everyone tucked in for the night. And, after thanking the Lord for this life-changing day, we slept.

Baby girl, you have been in our prayers for so long. So long, baby girl. Your daddy and I started praying for you over two years ago. Long before we found out that you had been born, and then that we had the OK to come and get you, we were head over heels in love with you. And now, now we finally get to see you. AND TO HOLD YOU! And to take you with us when we leave this building? Destiny Deoni Hooyer, you are finally in our arms, and we couldn’t possibly love you more!

Love, Mommy

Thursday, March 7th–Gotcha Day (Part I)

I’m writing this as if it was really March 7th, k? Play along. I’ve been busy. We’ll get to that next…

So, last night Brent and I packed up a ton of stuff for the boys, put it in the van, and drove over to my mom’s house. We brought the boys and all of their belongings in the house, and then we had an awesome homemade supper (awesome because it was my mom’s mashed potatoes and meatloaf, and awesome because I didn’t have to make it). We hugged and kissed the boys over and over (and over and over). We talked about what the next couple weeks would look like. They were so excited to be staying at Grandma’s house, and they were so excited that we were leaving to go get our baby girl.

We cried as we left my mom’s yard, knowing that we wouldn’t see the boys for at least two weeks. That, without a doubt, is the hardest part about this all. We’re so thankful for family that will take care of our boys for us.

We got home from Mom’s house at about 10:00 that night. We finished packing our stuff, got the van ready to go, and then Brent headed to bed. I thought it was more important to finish making a red headband for our baby girl to wear with a special little outfit I had for her. By the time I climbed into bed it was about 11:30pm.

At 2:00 AM our alarms started going off. We hopped out of bed with smiles on our faces climbed out of bed trying not to be grouchy. At 3:00 AM we climbed in the van and backed out of the garage. We were officially on our way to get our baby girl.

We made it to Sioux Falls at about 4:30. We checked our bags, made it through security and sat down at Gate 7. We were scheduled to board the plane at 5:30 and take off at 6:00. We patiently waited, and then boarded when our group number was called. We got seated and situated. I opened my book and started reading. And then…

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve just been told that there is a mechanical issue with this airplane. There seems to be a leak in the break line. Please take any items that you carried on to the plane, and we will de-board the plane at this time. Thank you for your patience.”

Ugh! Exactly 8 hours later (give or take a few minutes) we re-boarded the same airplane. Yep, we spent an entire day in the upstairs of the Sioux Falls airport (we didn’t feel like going through security again). Some people were EXTREMELY cranky about the situation. Me personally, I’d rather ride on a airplane that will get me safely from Point A (Sioux Falls) to Point B (Chicago).

We arrived in Chicago and had 30 minutes to go across the airport. We pretty much ran the entire way, and we made it with 3 minutes to spare. We boarded the next plane and we were on our way to Charlotte. I couldn’t believe it. We were almost there.

Originally we were supposed to be in Charlotte, NC, by 1:45 PM. Then we were supposed to head directly to the agency for placement yet that afternoon. When we heard that we wouldn’t land in Charlotte until 7:30 PM, we assumed they would tell us to just check-in to the hotel, and we would have placement Friday AM. I called Doris, the head of the agency, at some point while in Sioux Falls. She said that she was actually flying out Friday morning, so we would need to do placement yet that night.

On the flight to Charlotte, emotions started hitting. As we started to descend, the tears started falling. With every mile that we got closer to Charlotte, we got closer to our baby girl.

And then… we touched ground.

We were in Charlotte… We’re coming, baby girl! Mommy and Daddy are coming!

What did I do?

**This is the 2nd time I’m typing this post. Not sure what happened to the first one, but I’m going to guess that this 2nd version will be shorter. :)**

It seems that I started a bad habit. Suddenly (since my post last week-ish), it seems it’s impossible for my boys to go to sleep with out me sitting in their room. Guess I have a chance to keep my blog updated now.

So, here’s a couple pictures. Cuz I like to show off my handsome little men:

(Couldn’t love these boys more!)

(My future football player)

(This one has attitude, I tell ya!)

No New News

Yep, 2 posts in one night. (In other words, Brody still isn’t sleeping, so I have more time to blog.)

I thought maybe I should update about our adoption. After the failed adoption, basically our book just got put back in the “waiting” stack. So, anytime there is a situation that matches with our Baby Wish List (which was pretty much wide open), our book will be shown.

Brody has just started asking again when we’ll get a baby. I wish I had some kind of answer for him. I wish I could tell him that it will be by this summer, or next fall or winter. It could be 5 years down the road. We don’t know. But God does. And I love that.

God has given us a great peace about this time spent waiting. There are some days that I even forget that we are, in fact, waiting. Then, when I realize that I had forgotten, I feel guilty. It’s weird.

Until then, we will continue to eagerly anticipate the day when we hold our baby for the first time.

Thanks for all your prayers, friends. They’re worth much more than you know!

The Sound of Sleep

Tonight I had big plans. I will admit that I was excited to slip away all by myself. What did my big plans consist of? I was going to take my Bible, my computer, some paper, a pen and enough $ for a Diet Coke (and probably a Scotcheroo – I have no idea how to spell that word), and I was going to sit at a coffee shop in town. All. By. Myself. And it was going to be awesome.

But then… it got icy. And the fog is so thick. But, to be honest, I still considered going.

And then…Karter wanted someone to snuggle in bed with him. And while it took every ounce of willpower to say no… I told him he could climb in bed, we’d say prayers, and then I’d hang out on Brody’s bed until Karter fell asleep (while Brody is downstairs with Daddy).

So… my night was even better than planned. I grabbed my computer, pulled up Biblegateway.com, tucked Karter into bed, prayed with him, and am now listening to the sound of him sleeping. And, as if that weren’t enough, I can hear Brody and Brent playing downstairs.

Does it get any better than this?

Maybe only if I had a Diet Coke in here with me.

Jesus, thank you for the sound of Karter sleeping in his warm bed. Thank you for nightlights and blankets and bedtime stories. Thank you also for Brody’s one-on-one time with Brent. Thanks for rocking chairs, cartoons and farm toys. You are so good to us, and I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Jesus, we love you. Amen.

My “Want” List

**WARNING: If you are hoping to read some uplifting post, you may want to exit out. I’m just sayin…

Today is tough for me. I wasn’t expecting it to be, but it has been. I want to be home with my boys. Actually, I want to be home with my boys (all 3) and my baby girl. I want to be on leave from work. I want to be tired from getting up during the night, and I want there to be a combination of Transformers and baby dolls to wrap and put under the tree. I want to rewash all the baby clothes that we washed and put into a suit case, but I want to rewash them because they’ve been worn.

That is really want I want.

But since that’s not possible, here’s want I want in place of those things.

I want someone to come and tell me what to do with all the baby clothes that we have. Actually, I want someone to just come take care of them for me, because right now it hurts less to leave them lay on my bedroom floor than it does to have to pack them up.

But then here’s the other place that my head and my heart go:

I want the chance to bring a few special gifts to Brooke. I want to sit and visit with her and see how it’s going. I would love to be able to visit with her about Christmas and Christ and the one True Love. I would love to be able to tell her how many people have lifted her, her sweet baby and our family up in prayer. I would love to hug her and encourage her and let her brag about her beautiful baby. I would love to read Ephesians 3 to her and explain what that has meant in my life.

Hey, at least I don’t ask for much, right?

Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! His faithful love endures forever. Psalm 106:1

Exposed Hearts

The danger in exposing your whole heart is that sometimes you feel like it’s being torn. Those times, however, when we think it’s being torn, maybe it’s actually just being stretched and shaped to make room for blessings you just don’t know about yet.

Thank you, God, for seeing the big picture. Please, please reveal just a little bit more to me.

12/12/12 – A Day I Won’t Forget

Let me start not on 12/12, but back a while.

October 15th

I’m at work, and I get an email. When I see Heidi’s name (our social worker) come up on my email list, my heart stops and my palms sweat. Immediately. It’s a pretty amazing reaction, actually. Anyway, I quickly scanned her email as I dialed Brent’s phone number.

I told him the situation and told him we could talk about this. I said that I was open to it, even though it was a situation that we initially had said we were not open to. He said there was no use in talking, then, because he was open to this, too. I immediately emailed Heidi back and said we would love our book to be shown.

Well, a few missed meetings and a lot of prayers later…

November 12th

I had a meeting over lunch. Brent knew that. He tried calling me when we were on our way back to the office. We were just about back, so I just hit the “ignore” button and figured I’d call him back when I got to my desk. No more than 10 seconds later, my phone was ringing again. We were in the parking lot, so I answered the phone as I got out of Lori’s truck.

Brent was in the parking lot, and he needed me to come sign some 401K paperwork. So, I quickly went to his truck and hopped in. Instead of paperwork, he handed me a pink little sleeper and asked how I thought that would look on our baby girl.

WE HAD BEEN CHOSEN! And a girl? A girl!

I just remember sitting there and saying, “What?” Every detail he would tell me, I would respond by saying, “What?” in complete shock and disbelief.

We had so much fun telling family and friends. But most of all… we could not wait to get home and tell the boys! They were so excited (to say the least).

Kristi came with me to pick out fabric. I made a baby blanket. I finished sewing the crib bedding that I had started earlier in the adoption process.

November 29th

Brent and I tried to go in to work for a little while. This day was far too exciting, though. This was a day that I had dreamed about so many times. Not all couples that adopt get to experience this, and I felt blessed beyond words to be meeting the birthmom. Brent and I met Heidi (social worker) and Brooke (the birthmom) at a restaurant. For two hours we sat and talked to her and got to know her. We talked about our hopes and dreams, and she told us hers. We felt like we completely bonded with her.

That brings us to 12/12/12.

We had been packing our stuff for about a week. Brody and I had packed the baby’s suitcase a couple nights before. It was fun to go through all those clothes. I had bought a little outfit for Christmas day. I imagined all the people coming and wanting to see her. I had dreamed about all the Christmas pictures of her with the boys. Karter asked if I would bring her to school on the day that he had the share bag.

Anyway, back to 12/12. We were all upstairs. We were packing bags. It takes a lot of organization to be gone (and away from our boys) for up to two weeks. This was our attempt. We felt like it would be any day, and we needed to feel like we were somewhat prepared.

Then the phone rang. Now, I told you how I reacted when I got an email from Heidi. But let me tell you… when your social worker calls… you stop in your tracks.

“Hello?”

(sigh), “Oh, Kelli.”

Crap!

I just stood in shock as she told me that the baby was born earlier that day, and now Brooke was rethinking things. Heidi told us that we needed to pray. We needed to stop what we were doing and pray that God’s will be done.

And that’s what we did. As soon as we got off the phone, we sat on the floor of our bedroom, with tiny pink clothes all around us, and Brent prayed. He’s amazing. He prays passionately and honestly. We didn’t try to keep the boys still. Brody sat with his hands covering his ears, because he didn’t want to listen. Karter laid down and sobbed. I sat and struggled to breathe.

My heart was breaking. I was pretty sure of it. Heidi had told us that Brooke hadn’t made a decision yet. She thought that she would maybe make that decision on Thursday or Friday. When that decision was made, Heidi would call us.

Now what? What are we supposed to do? We did the only thing we could think of. We called our family and friends, and we asked them to join us in prayer. We knew they would, too. We snuggled with our boys. In fact, we fell asleep in their beds, and we loved every second of it.

December 13

I was hoping I would wake up today and this would all have been a terrible dream. I woke up wishing it all to go away. It didn’t. Should we be hopeful or realistic? It felt like those were my options. I wanted them to be the same thing. My wish would not come true.

Late this afternoon Heidi called back to say that she had heard from Brooke. Brooke had decided to parent this child. This baby that we had named, together with Brooke, would never fall asleep on Brent’s chest. She would never get to go to Karter’s class. She would never get to sleep in Brody’s bed, like he had been talking about for so long. And my arms, that don’t just long to hold any baby, but specifically for that baby… they would remain empty.

We are numb. We are trying to walk through this with our boys, and our families, and our prayer partners. All day long we received texts from friends and family. People that cared enough to send Bible verses and that called to just make sure we were OK.

We know that God put us on this path, and we believe that He will bring our baby home, even if it’s not the baby that we thought it would be.

We covet your prayers, for Brooke, for the baby, for Karter and Brody, and for Brent and myself. We are so thankful for an awesome social worker that gets it.

Here’s a picture that Karter drew for us. I guess it sums it up pretty well. It says, “I am sorry our little girl maybe won’t come home.”

Names

Karter’s votes:

- Boy Name: Toby (I think someone watches too much Good Luck, Charlie!)

- Girl Name: Ashley

Brody’s votes:

- Boy Name: Pencil

- Girl’s Name: Pencil

Hmmm… we’ll see what happens. Good thing we started this process before placement!

Ephesians 3: An Adoption Update

God is so good. (Duh, right?) Brent and I are trying really hard about spending time in The Word. I love how I can read a verse that I have read many, many times before, and use it to speak to me in new ways each time.

My life verse is found in Ephesians 3, specifically verses 18 & 19. Actually, I have a hard time saying exactly which verse it is, because I just love the whole chapter. Click HERE to read that chapter on Biblegateway.com.

Tonight, with adoption on my mind, I lean particularly on verse 20.

“God is able to do much more than we ask or imagine through His power working in us.”

Oh, the peace that brings me.

- When I’m not sure if I can wait one more minute to get a baby in our arms… God is able. It’s in those moments that I get a hug from the boys. And I must say, my boys give the best hugs!

- When I’m not sure where the money will come from to pay the placement fee… God is able. He provides fundraiser opportunities, and we continue to be amazed at the support we receive from friends, family and complete strangers.

- When I’m not sure how to answer Karter’s questions… God is able. He is able to work in the hearts of our boys. I love that they already have a heart for the orphans, and I pray that they never stop hearing God’s call to care for the orphans.

- When Satan gets through to me and makes me wonder if we can really do this; if we’re really cut out to be the parents of three kids… God is so much bigger than Satan! God provides family and friends that understand and are willing to pray for us.

It’s hard, and it’s not hard. Makes perfect sense, right? We’ve been a waiting family since May, and sometimes that’s hard. 5 months? Some people don’t even wait 5 days. And then other days I can’t believe that it’s really been that long. It seems like it was just a couple weeks ago that we got the email from our caseworker saying we were officially a waiting family. Oh, the emotions. That’s where we are now, though. We are waiting. 

Here’s what’s on my heart today: Somewhere out there is a woman that is making some life changing decisions. Not just life changing for herself, but for a child and for our family. I can’t imagine being in that spot. I must say, I am in awe of her already. I pray for her and for the people in her life. Then God speaks, “Kelli, do you have no faith? You pray for a sense of peace, the strength to get her through this time. I can do so much more than that. Do not limit Me.”

I do that. I limit God. Why do I ask for just enough strength to get through this (whether it be for me or for someone else)? So today, here’s my prayer…

God, You are a God of Love. I am in awe of how you love your own. Please, I’m begging that you use this situation, this circumstance. Use this to glorify you, like only You can do. By our own efforts, this will never work. Without you, no Mom could handle these decisions. No one could hand over a baby they just delivered to someone else and ask them to parent that child. God, it is simply by your strength. Tonight I ask you to be with every birthmother out there. I ask that they are simply overwhelmed by your love. I ask that, like it says in Ephesians 3, they may understand how wide and how long and how high and how deep Your love is. You are amazing, and I am so grateful for your love! Amen.

My New Love

On a whim, quite a long time ago, I bought a sewing machine. Nothing fancy, nothing new, just an old used sewing machine. I thought I would make bibs, spit rags, and other cute gift items. My end goal was to do this to help raise money for our adoption. Well, the machine sat in the box for a while. Then I found some random project that I wanted to try. So, I got the sewing machine out of the box and plugged it in. I cut my material and was excited to get going. I sat at my machine.

Ummm… How do you thread this beast?

I tried everything I could think of, but I could not get that thing threaded. Talk about feeling dumb.

So, I invited my mom over for Sunday dinner. After we got all the dishes cleaned up, I begged her invited her  to come help me thread my machine… you know, just to see if she still remembered how. Oh, thank heavens! She got it!

So she left, and I sat down and was all prepared to whip out at least my one project, maybe more. What? I have the wrong color thread? Oh, I’m sure I can get this.

Is one hour later too soon to invite my mom back? Cuz I can’t figure this dumb thing out AGAIN!

Finally Brent got sick of me yelling at my machine, so he went to Walmart and got me a new one. (He is truly the most thoughtful guy!)

Well, it’s been slow-going, and I’m kind of just learning as I go, but here’s a few things that I’ve made.

Baby bibs

Baby blankets

Onesies

A little dress (not for my boys)

Personalized Superhero capes (this one was for my nephew, Eli)

The Big Yellow Bus

I don’t know what is going on, but some big yellow bus just came and picked up my baby. He got on it, and they drove away. And I just know that when he comes back… he’s not going to be a baby anymore. I’m going to look at him differently, and he’s probably going to look at me differently. I’ll have to ask him things like, “Do you have any homework?” or “What was your favorite class today?” or “Why were you in the principal’s office?”

Last night was the Open House at Kinsey Elementary. I really think that this was so good for Karter. He got to see his teacher, Mrs. Dahm. This wasn’t the first time they met. He had her as a teacher for Kindergarten Round Up, and he really liked her. He was very excited when he found out that she was his Kindergarten teacher. Honestly, so was I! I think their personalities will work really well together.

It was also good for him to walk through school again and find his room. There was a bus parked outside, and we could take him on there and talk through the process of riding the bus. That is the one part that Karter is worried about… riding the bus. He’s worried about big kids picking on him, not finding a seat, and getting on the wrong bus.

He really did very well getting on the bus this morning, though. He was a little reluctant. It helped that Brent left work to come watch him get on the bus. I love having such a caring husband! (And I greatly appreciate that his boss let him leave for a few minutes).

I can’t wait to pick Karter up at the end of the day and see how his first day went.

Here we go…

This is it. This is my last week as a parent with no kids in school. Well, last year Karter was in preschool, but that meant he was still little, right? Nope, not anymore. Next week, I will get my two babies boys ready to go. Brody will still go to Gretchen’s house, just like he has 5 days a week for since he was 2 months old (insert sigh of relief from this Mama). Karter, on the other hand, will get dressed in his new clothes, his new shoes, and his new backpack, and he will enter a brand new phase of his life.

Yep… Karter is heading to Kindergarten. One week from now he will officially be a Warrior! He is so excited to have the same teacher that he had the day of Kindergarten Round-Up (which I’m very excited about, too, because I just know that her personality will be perfect for Karter). He already knows a few of the kids that will be in his class, but he’ll also have the chance to make a lot of new friends. He gets to ride a bus (which he’s dreading) to and from school.

I’m so sad and so excited that we’ve reached this point. As much as I would love it if my little fellas could stay little… I love the fact that they’re growing up. I love the people they’re becoming, and I’m so excited to see what God has in store for them.

Karter – I am so proud of how you are growing. I love your heart, little boy (just let me call you that, ok?). I love that you still miss Kevin, the dog, because it shows me how much you love others. You are funny without trying to be. You know sarcasm (which scares me), and you use it appropriately (which scares me even more). You are kind and respectful (when you want to be). Even though you like the Lions more than the Bears… I’ll keep you around. Mom loves ya buddy!

Brody – You are three (for another month and three days), so please stop acting like you’re 8. You are one crazy little kid, and I LOVE it! You can not get enough of your Daddy (I don’t blame you), and I think it’s awesome. Almost every morning you wake up talking about animals, and it shows me where your heart is. I love how passionate you are. I know you’ll miss your big brother when he’s in school, but you have good buddies at daycare and you’ll have a great time! But seriously… stay little a little bit longer, k?  You’re my baby, and I love you!

God, thank you for the opportunity to send our kids to school and day care. Some people long for these days and don’t get to experience them. May I never take these milestones for granted.

** Don’t worry… pictures are coming… soon.

Overwhelmed and Thankful

I know I haven’t talked about about our adoption on our blog. That shouldn’t surprise anyone… because I haven’t talked about anything on our blog. I simply haven’t blogged. It’s because we’ve been busy, and I’ve been overwhelmed. But today I really want to talk about our adoption. Today is a new chapter in our adoption story, and I really just want to tell everyone.  So here goes (please don’t read too closely, because I am not even going to proof read this before I hit publish)….

On November 9, 2009 I wrote this post about not being able to have more kids naturally. Ever since then Brent and I began to feel the adoption seed growing in our hearts, and it became more and more clear that this is what God had planned for us. We sent off for our very first adoption application. It didn’t take long before we heard back from the agency. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the news we wanted to hear. They explained in the letter that there would need to be extra research due to the Leukemia. The part we focused on was that they said that we could be told no or asked to wait a couple years. After reading this, we gave ourselves time. Time to grieve the option of having more kids naturally. Time to get Brent’s health under control. Time to be a family of 4 before worrying about being a family of 5. Quite honestly… after being told that we couldn’t have more kids naturally, I simply couldn’t take being told no to adoption, too. Brent and I each struggled with this (without really knowing that we were doing this), and God was faithful and protected us. In fact, that’s part of why I didn’t blog about it. I felt like if I just didn’t talk about it, and if I didn’t send in our application… well then I couldn’t be told no. I felt like that made me in control. Well, God had another plan. He put people in our lives that have adopted or that have a heart for adoption, and He used them to make it very clear to us what His plan was for our family.

Well, finally on February 6, 2012 we completed our adoption application and sent it off. It was a leap of faith, and we were ready to make it. In only one short week, we heard back from the agency. We had been approved to move to the next step in the process. Since that time we have completed our home study and our profile books. In fact, just today a box arrived at our agency in Blue Earth, MN (New Horizon Adoption Agency). It included 5 copies of our profile book, a thumb drive with pictures to put on their website and our next payment.

What does that mean? We are officially a waiting family. They will now start showing our books to birthmothers.

I am overwhelmed.

Every since last Sunday, Mother’s Day, my heart has been so heavy just thinking about the amazing person who will give birth to a child and then, for whatever reason, will give that child to us. I watched a youtube video yesterday (link) about birthmothers and adoption. I just can’t get it out of my head. They talked about how they didn’t give up the baby because they didn’t want to be a mom, but they made that choice because of their great, great love for their child. So today, I am so overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed that God has put us on this path, and that someday we (hopefully) will get to meet the person that will give us their child, the exact child that God has picked for our family. I’m overwhelmed and extremely thankful to be walking this path.

Mini Caramel Rolls

Link to original post: http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Mini-Caramel-Rolls

Prep: 20 min. Bake: 15 min.

• Yield: 12 Servings

Ingredients

• 1/3 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/3 cup butter, cubed
• 2 tablespoons light corn syrup
• 1-1/2 teaspoons 2% milk
• 1 tube (8 ounces) refrigerated crescent rolls
• 2 teaspoons sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Directions

• In a small saucepan, combine the brown sugar, butter, corn syrup and milk. Cook and stir over medium heat until butter is melted and sugar is dissolved. Pour into a greased 9-in. pie plate; set aside.
• Separate crescent dough into four rectangles; gently press perforations to seal. In a small bowl, combine sugar and cinnamon; sprinkle evenly over rectangles. Roll up jelly-roll style, starting with a long side; pinch seams to seal.
• Cut each into nine slices; place cut side down in prepared pie plate. Bake at 375° for 15-18 minutes or until golden brown. Cool in pie plate for 1 minute before inverting onto a serving plate. Yield: 12 servings.

Nutritional Facts 3 rolls equals 155 calories, 9 g fat (4 g saturated fat), 13 mg cholesterol, 189 mg sodium, 17 g carbohydrate, trace fiber, 1 g protein.